Sunday, February 24, 2013

Warning! Slippery Slobber Ahead

Yes, I feel the need to post this warning now to anyone who may come to my house. 

I never thought I would need to have a warning like this but then again I never really thought about the fact that I would one day absolutely love a 100lb dog who - yes - slobbers.

I had an awesome weekend in Phoenix at the Joyce Meyer conference with several gal pals.  The Lord really spoke to me and confirmed many things that I had been thinking over the last couple of months.

Plus it was a nice break to get away with friends and talk and shop a little and attend this conference together.  Upon arriving home Saturday evening however, my excitement started dwindling.  I found out that an acquaintance of mine from high school had passed away (she was 2 yrs younger than me) from a massive stroke.  Then talk turned to some financial situations that will cause us to revamp some plans we had made.  By the time I went to bed I was a little more on the grumpy side - then morning happened and the rush of trying to get ready for church, showers that should have been done the night before, casserole for fellowship dinner - that also should have been done the night before etc. By that time I was really grumpy and then it happened, the reason why I now must warn people who come to my house to not only be aware of the 100lb beast we now call "Bigfoot" but of her ever present gift to us - slobber!

I was walking quickly back to my room to finish dressing and before I knew it - Wham, bam, oomph, *#@#.  I was flat on the floor and my right foot was throbbing.  Apparently I had stepped in slobber. I couldn't even talk my foot hurt so bad, I guess I had made some sort of noise because everyone came running but as my husband was asking "What happened?" I couldn't even make a sound.  He helped me up and helped me to the bed. And all I could think about was is this a consequence for my bad attitude this morning.  I was so huffy (not sure if that is a word to describe an attitude, I know it is a bike, however I'm going with it) that I wasn't paying attention to where I was stepping,  I was in such a hurry due to the fact that I had accomplished nothing the night before and I was thinking about how bad this day was going to be and then it got worse.

I did make it to church and only limped around a little but by the time I got home my whole body was aching.  I took some pills and took a nap.  I'm pretty sore still and my foot is starting to turn various shades of blue in one area but I can't stop thinking about something that Joyce Meyer said in her sermons this weekend. "Offenses are stumbling blocks in our walk with God", here I was so excited about what the Lord had been speaking to me this weekend and then I started to get so frustrated and upset about things that were happening (taking offense) - I stumbled. Literally, in dog slobber.

God cared about all those things that I started dealing with upon my arrival - did I once take any of these things to Him, no I didn't.  He cares about my friends family, he cares about all that I do at home and at church.  I had no reason to get flustered and down.  This is the day that the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it. I hope and pray I can get a handle on that someday!

Monday, February 11, 2013

God Knows....

God knows.....

That I am grieving for friends who have had a major loss in their journey to have a family, I am heartbroken for them and their family and friends who have been walking this road with them.  I don't understand why this has happened this way and I am fighting anger and frustration along with the overwhelming sadness that I am feeling. But God knows and He has them in His hands.

God knows....

That I am also grieving for a friendship that I thought was real.  I am realizing that this friendship is one where I am continually there for the other person but the other person isn't there for me.  I have come to realize over the last few weeks that this person is very self-centered and that I do not mean as much to her and she means to me.  I also realize that I don't have the energy to babysit this relationship.  I will always be there for her and love her but I need to remove my heart from what I thought this was and accept it for what it really is. God knows and He will help me deal with it.

God knows....

The person that I am stretching to be and when I fail miserably, He knows I am trying.  I am making good changes and it is a process that will not happen overnight.  No matter how much I mess it up, He will not give up on me because God knows - God knows who He has intended me to be and He knows that I will get there one day.

God knows....

Thursday, February 7, 2013

God, Grant Me Serenity.....

God, grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can, and the
Wisdom to know the difference.

This has been an eventful week - some good, some bad and some that I am not sure what to make of yet.  I woke this morning after a restless sleep and remembered this poem that I have cherished since I was young.

No matter what I need to rely on Him to help me figure out what (if anything) I need to do.  I think what stresses me the most is when I have no influence on a situation that someone else is in control of and yet it affects me and mine. I have never thought of myself as a control freak, but maybe there is a little part of me that is.

But then again maybe that is also the boldness that the Lord is bringing out in me.  He is putting in my spirit the desire to fight for things I think I need to fight for (with his guidance of course) instead of being a push over. To approach Him with confidence and He will guide us.

"So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most."
Hebrews 4:15-16

"Because of Christ and our faith in him, we can now come boldly and confidently into God’s presence."
Ephesians 3:11-13

Maybe the feeling of lack of control is actually the call from the Lord to seek Him and His answers boldly. In the Spirit realm, we do have influence and the Lord knows the desires of our hearts and He can reach people whom we can't.